History of Cookies :)

I like cookies, who doesn't! Let's face it we all could do things to improve out health. Tuesday begins what I am referring to currently as Boot Camp.  I am working with the owner of my gym, having training twice a week and then circuit training and cardio twice a week.  I want to show I can lose the weight and keep it off without using some fad diet or taking pills. I want to lose it and he wants to help me get there! So together we will be monitoring my food intake, the quality of my food, portion size, and of course the coup de gras= exercise.

Exercise is my worst enemy.  I HATE sweating, I hate feel sore or achy for days after. The weight is not going to go away until I make the personal commitment to move past what I hate and bear the grunt to show on the outside the person I am.

This blog will be my release, my aggravations, my frustrations, and most importantly my success.  So feel free to live through my fight with me. To understand the fight you have to understand me and the history of my cookies and weight :)

There are things I am about to say that I don't tell everyone or care to relive.  However, I must face the past to build myself back up, healthy, to move forward with my success.

Every since I was little I was active but also big. I have not been below 200 pounds since the 5th grade.  I have come close several times in my life but for whatever reasons I never kept at it to hit goal.  Oh yeah by the weigh my goal is 170 pounds.  Currently I am 232. Another thing I don't make known.  So my fight- I remember always being picked on for being the fat kid from 6th grade on.  A girl in my 8th grade class thought it would be funny to pull out my chair when I was sitting down, ended up in the hospital. What she didn't know is that I hurt my back months before and a few days before this happened I finally finished physical therapy.  My back. I always have back problems, part from the weight, and part from accidents or incidents such as that one. I feel I sometimes use my back to get out of pushing myself further.  NO MORE!

High school was great. I really was active and ended up getting down to 205 for my junior and senior year. I love it I felt great and looked great. Once graduation hit, I was scared to leave, scared of college, and just plain scared.  I have always used food for comfort, whether I was lonely, mad, sad, or happy.  Food was my thing. Cookies were my thing. I moved away 2 months after graduation and started gaining weight again in college. Started losing again at the end of my freshman year. That summer I got into a relationship.

I didn't realize it then, but I was so unhappy and ate my way through my unhappiness. Without realizing I blew up to 300 pounds. I am guessing 300 because I refused to weigh myself, but was in size 20 jeans which just crushed me.  I have always been in an 18 for most of my life.  There was one major event that happened, even though it was a short simple conversation.  My brother mentioned to my mom how unhappy I seemed and I was gaining serious weight and needed to realize what I was doing to my body.  It took courage but I ended the relationship I was so miserable in. I started living for me and the weight started coming back off.  I got in the gym and just did what I could. 

I got down to 220 when I moved to Greenville in 2010 after accepting a job near my family.  I have lived in Greenville now for almost two years and it has been a battle of me having the energy or want to lose it and months of not caring or thinking I'm good.  Well I am not. 

I love my life and doing it on my own.  Finally got my own place here and I know my entire family is supporting me with everything I do. I know they want me to succeed in my weight loss as much as I do.

So its Memorial Day weekend.  Tuesday I will begin a journey to lose 62 pounds or more through hard work and dedication.  I really want my body to resemble me, my personality, and who I am on the inside. I want to be healthy and be able to enjoy hiking, fishing, camping and anything I want to do in life.  This battle has gone on long enough and i'm ready to put forth all the energy to make myself happy.

So if you want, check back to see the updates of my journey!